Peak season is coming up and I am sure a lot of you newbie’s and old hands are excited about your upcoming vacation. You made it to Thailand, you have had a few drinks, explored the pickings, and have just chosen your pick of the litter, and the question pops into your head “could this be a ladyboy?” Yikes!
As a newbie, I have been wondering if I can truly recognize a ladyboy. Prior to coming to Bangkok, I had first heard of ladyboys from TV reports and from the Howard Stern radio show. I thought it interesting and bizarre that guys could look so hot. I had seen black transvestites before when roaming NYC, but could always tell that they were men in drag. Ladyboys seem to be a different bred…
So how can you tell if it is a ladyboy? Most of this I have gotten from reading blogs, some are observations and other comments are just for fun. This is more or less to help us all avoid similar situations as reported by Shuttlecock and others. See WARNING! WARNING! A must read for Newbie’s. I would hate for my first time (or any time) to be with a ladyboy.
Those with experience and exposure need to chime in. Hopefully when we are all done, this will be an idiot’s guide to ladyboys.
Obvious things to look for, but these do not necessarily mean it‘s a ladyboy — it could be just one ugly woman:
- The bulge in her sexy bikini bottom.
- Her receding hairline, and I am not talking about down below.
- A larger than normal head.
- A larger than normal nose.
- Taller than normal.
- A large protruding eyebrow area. What’s this called — a brow line?
- An Adam’s apple. With this, she won’t be the apple of your eye.
- Large, but pretty manly hands.
- Large feet, although with high heals it is difficult for me to tell if the feet are large. Starting to think my maid is a ladyboy considering her feet.
- A voice like Darth Vader. “Hansum man, I am your father”
- A laugh like Herman Munster. “AR AR AR AR”
- Stubble showing through her caked on but perfect makeup.
- She uses the urinal next to you. Kind of strange to have someone standing next to you at the urinal in a sexy bikini.
- When visiting her apartment, the toilet seat is always up.
- When speaking Thai, occasionally ends sentences with “khap” rather than “kha.” “You boom boom me, khap”
- If it looks like a guy, it’s a guy. Hopefully we all know this already, but with beer goggles on we need to be careful.
Not so obvious:
- A perfectly proportioned body. To me most of them seem to have nicer curves than your average Thai girl.
- Larger and firmer than normal breast. In other words, implants. Are there many Thai girls that get implants?
- No breasts at all. Flat as a pancake!
- S/he could be the hottest girl in the pack. Amazes me how hot they can look. Usually the voice gives it a way.
- A tendency to play with her hair a lot. Read this somewhere.
- Tend to act overly feminine. I guess this is a way to try to make up for the balls between her legs. Noticed this while watching them come and go from Nana.
- I can only image that if s/he has had the complete operation between the legs that it can’t look or feel like the real product. Anyone want to comment on this? Any time I think about this I picture and smell ham. Don’t think it would smell like fish unless it’s store bought fish.
- I had two bar girls tell me to look at the elbows. Didn’t fully understand, but I think they were saying that if it bends back to the point where there is a dimple at the elbow, then it’s a ladyboy. Or was it there would be no dimple. Need to learn more Thai. (I dated someone in the states that had dimples at the elbows. She was no ladyboy!)
- Another possible way of telling if it is a ladyboy: I have been in two ladyboy gogo’s and have noticed that when they sit next to me they put out more heat than a real woman. Just didn’t feel the same. Anyone else notice this? May have to start taking temperatures…could you please bend over or open your mouth real wide, wider, no, a little wider.
As I said before, after visiting two ladyboy go-gos, I am amazed at how hot most of the ladyboys can look. An interesting, fun and jaw dropping experience! Laughed a lot, but mostly had a look of utter amazement on my face.
So are you now as confused as I am? And it doesn’t help that the ladyboys can have operations to remove or cover up the tell tell signs.
Other thoughts:
If you are seriously drunk, don’t even think about taking someone home, since you most likely will pull a ladyboy. If you do pull a ladyboy, and find out later on, go throw up, and no matter how pissed you are, just pay it to get rid of it. Take a long shower, brush your teeth, cry, call your mommy, and then head out for a threesome with two Thai hotties. Never get violent with any Thai’s in Thailand.
The thought of doing this post came about while reading one of the other blogs. There was a comment about a certain King’s go-go having higher numbers for ladyboy badges. The double digits are for the real thing and triple digits are for the ladyboys. Is this true?!
Because, the other night I was in a Patpong go-go bar (King‘s ??? 1), it was packed, and I was approached by one very hot Thai girl. She had all the right moves…took my hand all over her body to feel the merchandise. Wow! She had to be the best looking bar/go-go girl I have come across yet. Seeing that I had had about nine beers so far, and that it was getting late, and my wife would be expecting me home, I passed on her offer to take me upstairs for short time. It was killing me. I have not cheated on my wife, but this was the most I have been tempted so far.
My hottie was in the four hundreds. And if it is true about the badge numbering, can ladyboys have voices that sound like normal Thai girls? I have always counted that if nothing else gave it away, that the voice would.
By the way, I have nothing against ladyboys or those that hookup with them. I am a firm believer in doing whatever you want as long as you are not hurting anyone — “each to their own.” With that in mind. If a ladyboy hooks up with you without you knowing, you are being damaged. I see the possibility for demanding compensatory damages.
great observations - for me, acting overly feminine, playing with the hair especially while looking in the mirror are usually the giveaways. the bend in the elbow is also another good one. Thai women cannot hold their arms straight out - they seem to naturally bend at the elbow (perhaps this is true of all women?)
View all comments by kallah
I don’t know anyone who’s made the mistake. It’s obvious in 99.99% of cases just from looking at them across the room. If there’s any doubt, call “her” over and you’ll know within 3 seconds of talking to “her”.
The high/low badge numbering is in King’s Corner in Patpong, and only in King’s Corner. A 3-digit badge number anywhere else doesn’t mean a thing. Didn’t think there were any ladyboys in King’s Castle 1, but it’s a while since I’ve been.
Can’t help wondering whether all the “I thought she was a girl!” stories are from guys who were just curious but don’t want to admit it…
View all comments by Bangkok Bad Boy
If your out at a regular club (i.e. RCA, Ekamai…) It seems that the ladyboys are always the bet dancers. It seems to me most Thai girls dance pretty much the same, but Ladyboys just rock out and they seem to stand out from their dancing alone.
View all comments by bkk22
Another way of telling…..
After the introduction, maybe a drink and a gentle leg stroke…
Have an Arm-Wrestle.
If she wins, ditch her.
View all comments by Day walker
They are becoming pretty good at the transformation and with some it’s really hard to tell without talking to them. Their general body language usually gives it away for me though.
If a LB comes on to me I always say “Sorry I’m gay, I don’t like girls”, if it excitedly replies “I’m a boy, I’m a boy!” I reply “I only like real men, you look like a girl, sorry”. The facial expression this produces is priceless
If a LB shouts “handsome man!” you can retort with “you handsome man too!”
View all comments by Orion
They usually travel in packs.
View all comments by Khun J
When you wake up the next morning with no valuables and a burning sensation in your ass…..it was a ladyboy!
View all comments by Tripper
BBB: I agree that in most cases you can tell, however there are a few out there (I haven’t seen that many)that if it wasn’t for the voice I would never had known.
My main question is: can they sound like actual Thai girls?
I am starting to think yes. I had forgotten that when we first moved here, we were dealing with a person of unknown sex. When looking at it, we couldn’t tell if it was a male or female, and the voice was not sex specific. I was starting to think it was female because of the voice. A Thai friend finally figured that it was a male, since he added khub at the end of sentences.
As far as I know the hottie was female. The badge numbering thing is what started this. Wasn’t sure if it applied in this gogo.
Orion & Tripper: “you pretty man too. make my butt sore” Crack me up.
Another possible sign is a strong chin.
View all comments by MunchMouth
On a more constructive note, you could ask if they like “top” or “bottom”. A confused look could indicate a female. A smile and a quick reply could indicate a ladyboy. But… who really cares?
View all comments by tripper
Great stuff. I agree with bbb but would say that the percentage depends on how many you have seen. When I first moved here I was probably at 90% where I can tell. Now it’s about 99%. There is still that 1% that pass all the tests above.
Over a year ago I lost a bet with a friend who was dating a cut LB. His LB girlfriend was working as a dancer in a ladies GoGo in Nana and bet me if I could tell which one she was. I lost. She came over afterwards and I was amazed. She was the hottest in the place which should have been the indicator.
He told me about her and even showed me pics of her on the Internet. Almost impossible to tell. He even said she got wet below but that was a little hard to believe. Also, he mentioned that she really thought she was a girl and lopped off the meat and potatoes to complete the process. As a follow up, my friend moved back to the US and his girlfriend went nuts and trashed his apt. before he left but of course that has nothing to do with gender.
View all comments by pmmp
pmmp: What was your friends LB voice like? Did it give it away?
View all comments by MunchMouth
The one sure fire way to make sure sure that hottie you just pulled is, and never was packing heat is to do the arm check. I am sure this is what the service girls were talking about in the above write-up with checking the elbow. Test for yourself with someone you know to be female against your own arm. If you hold your arm out straight in front of you, you will notice your arm always is straight, even if you try to hyper-extend the elbow joint. Girls arms will always extend beyond straight meaning their elbows will always flex so that the elbow joint does not remain straight and appears somewhat hyper-extended.
View all comments by Billybob
addendum to bkk22 about ladyboys in regular clubs (particularly RCA i.e. Flix/Slim):
They also always seem to be a few hanging on the couches outside the men’s room, hoping to catch your eye with a smile as you walk in to do your business. These also aren’t the typical ones you can spot a mile away on Nana due to their overly feminine body language; they’re typically more elegant and sophisticated and definitely know how to play the game.
View all comments by mr. june
mm: No, passed all the tests, was in the 1%. I was even forced to touch his/her ass and it felt…well…like a chick’s ass. I think they let her dance at this GoGo because they consider him/her a lady, she was that close.
View all comments by pmmp
Sometimes, you simply do not know. It is difficult to say how accurate one’s judgement is.
View all comments by Zdan
If you screw 100 lady boys and it turns out that 1 is actually a woman, does that mean you can tell 99% of the time?
View all comments by Zdan
If you ever got a BJ that was too good to be true, it was probably from a LB
View all comments by Zdan
So pmmp…. your mates LB….
Would ya?
View all comments by Day walker
pmmp: So his/her ass felt like a chicks ass…hmmm…so does this mean you know what a guys ass feels like?
bbb: Turns out that the gogo I went to was Kings Corner! I was there tonight and saw the hottie. She took my hand outside her bikini botton to feel the “pussy”. It didn’t feel right…seemed to be higher than normal (although at this point in my life I am use to only my wifes pussy). I was very drunk the other time I was there and did not noticed all the ladyboys. Appear to be a number of them that have had the full operation.
I asked the hottie if she was a ladyboy and she said no and that I had asked her last time. She did pass the heat test. She was really pushing hard for me to take her upstairs, but again I refused. This time around my spidie senses were telling me that she is most likely a LB. If this turns out to be true, then my question regarding the voice sounding female is confirmed.
Side note: I did notice what I consider an extremely hot babe. Found out that she is the “number one” girl in the bar and that she gets to choose who she goes with. Guess I didn’t have the look she was looking for. Bitch! She missed out on the ride of her life! Although I was told her fee is 5,000 baht…I would have paid. She looked to be Asian Caucasian mix.
View all comments by MunchMouth
dw: not my type
mm: yes, after all I do shower at least once a day (sorry for the visual everyone)
View all comments by pmmp
The adams apple test is not fool proof. There are operations available for lady boys to shave down their adams apples (it is only cartilage) however these operations carry some risk in that the wind pipe could be damaged as a result.
You really need checks that you can carry out quickly rather than asking the ‘girl’ to do things such as trying to hyper-extend her elbows. If ‘(s)he’ speaks with a feminine voice then she is probably more genuinely feminine than most females in which case I would not worry about it. I also think there is a ‘finger test’ - males have longer index fingers than ring fingers (or is that the other way round??). Also, males have a large bony bump on the outside of their wrist (but some females do as well)
The best (although impractical) precaution is to always meet new girl in well lit conditions and when you are not drunk, tired (impairs judgement)or desperate for a female.
I once made a mistake in picking up a LB in the dark Twilo Live club in Patpong. He was a bit perverse in that he refused to let me know whether or not he was a LB. I bought him a drink but soon realised my mistake I said I was going to the toilet and never came back. Unfortunately he found me again when I was talking with a genuine girl.Unlike most others he refused to give up. It ended up with him throwing a bottle at me down the street when I ran off to get away from him(he had said that if I did not want him then I should give him taxi money to get home and I refused)
View all comments by Mike Phillips
Once, back in 1988, I saw a totally drunk French sailor making out with an incredibly obvious LB in a Patpong Disco. I figured he knew what he was getting into and didn’t care…
Anybody on this website ever live in Tokyo in the early 1990’s? There was a great bar in Roppongi called “Pip’s” that would really get going around 3:00 AM or later. The Filipina hostesses would get off work at their clubs and congregate in Pip’s playing the Video Juke Box and the Foosball table. One night, a particularly obnoxious American newbie to Tokyo, was chatting up “Erica”, a Flipper ladyboy. “Erica” ran in a pack of legitimate Flipper lasses and in the group, “s/he” was difficult to tell apart from the real girls. However, when he spoke, his voice had that creaky/crackily “ladyboy” tone and s/he really over did the female body language. All regualr Pip’s drinkers new about “Erica” and gave him a wide berth.
Anyway, this obnoxious Yank was chatting up “Erica” and by and by he put his arm around “her” and while walking over to the Pip’s exit, turned his head towards us with a big, shit-eating grin that seemed to say, “I’m getting laid tonight…”
Never saw him again and I hope “Erica” didn’t rip him too hard. (I also hope “Erica” didn’t get get beat-up either… Tokyo in the early 90’s wasn’t as easy-going as Thailand.)
Note: Pip’s was a great pick-up joint for “Flipper Freebirds”… Ah, those were the days.
View all comments by Bison
i thought that ladyboys were banned from the main discos and nightclubs? feel free to educate me….
there a special nightclub hotspot for them? they are by far the best dancers
View all comments by myspace.com/penfold_xxx
Grab your balls too tight…obvious one
View all comments by Young Royal
Ladyboys are great.
I prefer women, but the odd night with one of these depraved creatures is a joy.
They act way more feminine than farang women.
And they are not backwards at coming forward.
Try it once to see if you like it.
As Iggy Pop once said ‘an ass is an ass’.
View all comments by Jimmy Cricket
“The best (although impractical) precaution is to always meet new girl in well lit conditions and when you are not drunk, tired (impairs judgement)or desperate for a female.”
The last time I met all those conditions was 1984!
View all comments by werewolf
my - most clubs dont seem to care except for nana disco. But you will see them in bed and I think qbar. They tried banning them from cm2 but they blocked a very famous ladyboy model who was able to raise a big stink and cause the novotel some trouble. keep in mind there are moves in the government to recognize ladyboys as a gender. I think u even see them on RCA now.
View all comments by smitty
smitty: I saw in the paper that the government is considering allowing LB’s that have had the full operation to change their id’s from male to female. This will confuse things even more.
View all comments by MunchMouth
@Mike,sometimes males have longer ring fingers than index fingers,supposedly it indicates that the man in question has high testosterone levels.If a so called lady shows you her boobs in public you can be sure it’s a ladyboy. Or else the big handbag full of cosmetics might be a giveaway. But if you have any doubts, ask to see her or his ID card.
View all comments by hanuman
Never been an issue for me - my tastes in ladies is obviously different to other posters as I’ve yet to see a lady boy I’d seriously consider bar fining and I’d rather pay for sex with a hot chick than have free sex with an ugly one. To me they all seem to range from cute-but-subtly-deformed to the grotesque. I don’t think I have a LB detector so much as an ugly chick filter.
View all comments by Cabby
“big handbag full of cosmetics”. My very limited experience from my last trip was that Thai woman didn’t cary any such bag/purse/suitcase.
Was this limited to my particular ‘friend’, or it is more generally?
I remember finding it a little odd how she would use the hotel toothbrush, and my deodorant - I would have thought a little overnight kit would be practical.
View all comments by Rob
the best way to determine is via a DNA test (swab their cheeks and mail it to the mormons if you need to), but even that is only 99.9% (or so) accurate, since some individuals are neither XY nor XX, they’re XXY or X0 — how do you classify them?
the next best way is a look at the ID card. learn to recognize the thai equivalents of “mr” and “mrs/ms,” and learn to spot a fake ID. look here for that info: http://forum.myredbook.com/cgi-bin/dcforum2/dcboard.pl?az=show_thread&om=2408&forum=intl
tell her you’re paranoid about being caught with a women
View all comments by fountainhead
If ever there is a doubt… then there is no doubt.
View all comments by Day walker
Here’s one that always seems to work:
Have “it” put one hand flat on a table. Examine the second (index) and fourth (ring) fingers. From my own admittedly anecdotal data collection research, men will always have a ring finger that is longer than the index finger. With women, the two fingers will always be nearly the same length.
Can anyone else confirm this?
View all comments by flyonzewall
yeah, that one works too - just as good as the bend in the elbow but easier to demonstrate. just tell him/her that she has beautiful nails and that you want to get a closer look at them - she should gladly remove her hand from your crotch and put her hand flat on the table for you to inspect. all conjecture on my part - she’d have to be a very good ladyboy to keep someone uncertain about her sex to get to that point.
View all comments by kallah
The cervix is always my last resort.
View all comments by MonyetNakal