300,000 more baht and she’s done working bar. 300,000 more and she’s done supporting the parents. At least that’s what Meow figures. And hopes.
Meow, 22, has worked Pattaya’s Walking Street bars for most of the past two years. With a perfectly proportioned 41 kg. figure, no children and an bubbly personality, she’s done better than most at using her feminine charms to wrest money out the farangs who pass through her bar. If she can maintain her previous pace, Meow figures it will take about six months to get that last three hundred grand.
And then, for the first time, she’ll be free of the bars, her sponsors and her mother. For the first time, she’ll be in control of her own life.
Internet blogs like this one are full of tales of bar life from the customer’s perspective. There are relatively few published insights into the lives of the girls, however. Sure, we’ve all talked to the dancers and hostesses and have heard the scams and sad stories. Werewolf recently compiled many such anecdotes into a fictional yarn about what a bargirl thinks as her day unfolds. The story below, however, is true. Only the names and places have been changed to protect the innocent and not quite so.
The Road to Pattaya
Like so many girls from Thailand’s northeast, Meow didn’t plan to become a prostitute. She stayed in school through age 15 in Phetchabun, scoring near the top of her class. Getting encouragement rare for females in Isaan, her teachers had her take college entrance exams and she passed easily. She dreamed of university life.
Her parents, however, had other ideas. Meow is just one of two children and her parents had long ago decided there was only enough money to send one child to university: her younger brother. So Meow went to work on the family’s tobacco farm and married a local Thai man five years her senior. Contrary to the bargirl myth that “Thai man no good,” her husband was kind, funny and sexy. The made love daily for their first year together and when the doctor told her she was pregnant, there were smiles all around.
But everything changed when she lost the baby. And, again contrary to the usual story, she admits it was her that destroyed the marriage. After the miscarriage she began to drink and then “butterfly.” The husband walked out.
Having lost child and husband and with her brother entering his last year of primary school, Meow fled to the industrial city of Rayong, where she landed a job in a computer hard drive factory. Her small hands proved quick and skillful and she was promoted into quality assurance. It paid more, but at just 220 baht per day not enough to quiet the incessant phone calls from her mother. So, despite her already long hours, she took a night job in a karaoke club catering to Korean and Japanese employees of the area’s auto plants. It was there that she had sex for money for the first time.
It wasn’t often and the money was good. But she remembers being mortified at being seen out with one 79-year-old Korean car executive. He was kind and sleepy back in the room, however, and didn’t demand much. And the 3,000 baht she got for the night was nearly two weeks pay at the factory. She started sending more money home. Her mother never asked where it came from.
End of the Line
Factory life came to an abrupt end, however, when one of Meow’s co-workers saw her with a customer and decided to gossip down the assembly line. Meow punched her in the face, ripped her finger nails down the girl’s cheeks and the police were brought in. Meow paid the girl 500 baht and was given her walking papers. That night she and a co-worker sick of factory life caught the bus to Pattaya.
Meow says she was just along for the ride. She fully planned to return to Rayong and another factory. Her friend Ae didn’t. She had a friend that worked in the now-defunct Voodoo go-go bar who had told her of the money that could be made. Dang, a battle-hardened whore who’d been working around Pattaya for six years, met them at the gate of Walking Street. Meow remembers never having seen so many foreigners in one place.
Even before they completed the 200-meter walk to Voodoo, a European man in his early 50s approached the trio. He got straight to the point: He wanted Meow. But she didn’t want to go. For starters, she could speak only a couple words of English. And he was old. Dang and Ae prodded her to accept when the Dutchman agreed to pay 3,000 baht for a one-hour short-time. Afraid the farang would take advantage of Meow, Dang collected the cash in advance. She held the money and Meow took the walk.
As it turned out, the two never had intercourse. Just 39 kilos at the time, she was simply too small for him. Unable to even say sorry, she remembers that she simply waied the man and smiled. He let her go after 15 minutes.
Strangely, while Meow was thrilled with the money, it would be the only barfine she’d take for the next month. She went to work in Voodoo, as a showgirl no less. On her first night she stripped down to her birthday suit without reservation. She remembers the other girls’ amazement at her lack of shyness and the vigor she put into her dancing. Meow never learned the chrome pole shuffle and simply lost herself in the music and burned up her small podium. She got lots of offers and passed on them all, simply taking her 10,000 baht salary and tips.
Fast Forward
The lure of big money eventually grinds down even the most principled of women who work bars in Pattaya and today the Meow who spends the nights in the bed of her Dutch and Australian sponsors bears only a small resemblance to the one who turned down barfines for weeks at Voodoo.
In two years, she’s become conversational in English, thanks to a voracious appetite for language books and an obsession for studying. Her bookshelf has about a dozen dictionaries, phrase books and other study aids, many of which she says she’s read four or five times. She questions constantly, even while lying down to sleep, asking what this word means and how that word is pronounced.
For Christmas this year she was given a new Acer “netbook,” outfitted with Thai Windows, Office and Nokia software to get online anywhere. The day after receiving the pink mini notebook, she trooped off to Tukcom and returned with two computer books which she began working through from page one.
Those writing and computer skills are put to practical use in daily e-mails to her longtime customers abroad. While she makes the men no promises and sprinkles only the occasional “miss you” among her missives, she also doesn’t discourage the tormented pleas from her deluded suitors who, despite spending as few as three days with her months ago, profess they want to marry and have children with her.
“I don’t understand why I love you so much but you are the most important person in my life,” wrote Todd, a married 49-year-old Aussie whom Meow stayed with for two weeks in September. “Meow, I don’t know what you want to do with your life, but I want you to know you have me always. Wherever you go whatever you do i will always love you.”
Todd sends as many as three such e-mails a day. He texts and calls on top of that, sometimes breaking down into tears. Meow hangs up the phone or logs off and simply massages her temples, complaining all his angst gives her a headache and that she’s just about had enough of it. But, just as she’s ready to tell him to take a hike, he sends 50,000 baht to her bank account.
At the same time, she’s putting in up to two hours a day on the phone with a 43-year-old Dutchman who she spent three days with in the fall. He talks. She listens mostly. His conversation is usually the same. “I love you.” “I want to marry you.” Every couple of weeks he sends her money to keep her listening. Early in December he Western Unioned 7,000 baht to pay her rent and last week another 20,000 for Christmas.
Other than the rent money, she never asked for any of it. And she keeps virtually none of it. In Meow collected 79,000 baht from overseas men in the first three weeks of December and sent 55,000 to her parents. She’s holding the rest, but knows the phone call wanting more isn’t far off.
The Money Train
Meow’s mother claims she didn’t know her daughter was working bar until Meow brought her biggest customer ever - a man she thought she’d marry - home to Phetchabun a year after she began working at The Dollhouse, where she went after just a month at Voodoo. Meow said her father had figured it out, based on the sums she was sending home monthly, but she says she honestly believes her mother didn’t know because the sums weren’t outrageous.
That changed when Daniel walked into her bar.
In his mid-30s, flush with cash from working private security in Afghanistan and jacked up on cocaine, marijuana, Jack Daniels and Viagra when in Pattaya, Daniel fit the stereotype of the clean-headed lager lout Brit so many people decry. But he took an instant liking to Meow and after a month of touring together around Thailand, gave her 500,000 baht to pack up and go home while he went back to Afghanistan.
Despite the money, Meow’s mother disliked Daniel on sight, but he won her over by draping her with gold and buying her a new kitchen. The anger she unleashed on Meow after finding out her daughter had been working as a bargirl quickly succumbed to greed. She wouldn’t be happy again until both arms and her neck here encased in Thai gold.
Meow did as she promised and stayed at home and started putting Daniel’s money to work. She bought land to add to the family’s tobacco holdings and machines to work it. She put a deposit down on a new pickup truck so her father wouldn’t have to ride a motorbike to work. And she paid for all of her brother’s schooling.
All the while Meow talked to Daniel everyday, running up 20,000 baht monthly phone bills using 1-2-Call top-up cards. He always picked up the phone, even one day when Meow could hear rockets and gunfire in the background.
When he returned from the front, they returned to Pattaya and the romance continued. Once he filled their entire hotel room with more than 200 roses. He bought her a stake in a Samui dive shop and then, convinced this was the girl for him, he gave her 1.5 million baht to stop working bar forever.
Trapped
Little did she realize the money came with lots of strings. Even as her parents were using her funds to buy a new rice farm and pay back banks and loan sharks for past frivolous spending, the romantic Meow thought she was going to marry began to show his true colors.
He first required her to tattoo his full name across her left breast, but high enough it could be easily seen. Daniel took a copious number of photos of the new brand on his teerak’s chest, her only tattoo. Then the beatings began. As she recently scrolled through a CD-ROM of photos from her time with Daniel, she pointed out pictures in which she was smiling, only to say that after the photo was taken, he’d hit her. Other photos she wasn’t smiling at all.
The abuse was the worst while he was high, but even when he wasn’t he became increasingly jealous and paranoid. Daniel offered Meow another million baht if she promised to never see her parents again. He hated her father and was convinced that a small neighbor boy who Meow doted on during her trips home was, in fact, an offspring of an ongoing incestuous affair between Meow and her father.
Increasingly, Meow said, she felt trapped. She had no money of her own anymore and could not escape Daniel. Then she found out she was pregnant again.
Ever since her teenage miscarriage Meow had wanted another child. Daniel had told her he wanted to baby with her as well, but when she told him, he flew into a rage, sure it was her father’s child. He stormed off to the pharmacy and returned with a bottle of a bittler-tasting liquid he forced her to drink. Two days later she miscarried.
For Meow’s family, that was the final straw. Her father, brother and some neighbors chased Daniel out of Isaan, promising to kill him if he ever returned. Her mother ordered her never to see him again. She was only too happy to oblige, but with the 2 million baht now nearly exhausted it was back to the bars in Pattaya to meet her family obligations.
Not the Same Girl
Meow returned to Pattaya and The Dollhouse in July, but she was not the same go-go girl who’d left there eight months before. Before Daniel, she was a workhorse, indiscriminately taking whatever man would pay her asking price. Two barfines in one night was not uncommon and one 30-day month she racked up 35 “offs,” 130 lady drinks, and countless tips and ping-pong balls. Her monthly take was often in the 100,000 baht range.
A lot of this, of course, went back home. But lots was spent in Pattaya. She spent 5,000 baht plus on her phone bill, kept a 10,000 baht apartment, rented a motorbike, collected shoes at a pace to rival Imelda Marcos and gave lots of money to girls making less. Extremely bright, funny, conversational, slim and attractive, she rarely went for less than 3,000 short time and often easily scored 5,000 long-time.
While she continued to get the same rates for her services, the number of customers dropped off. She started focusing more on men on longer holidays and staying with them as long as possible. In August she stayed with a Dutchman named Jan who, despite taking home only about 2,500 euro a month, lavished her with gold and baht for a month.
Then came Todd from Australia for two weeks and Hans, the three-day Dutch visitor who’d become her best sponsor. In October she had just 12 barfines and, in November, only six, many of which she paid herself.
The gold she collected went into a safe in her room in Phetchabun. The cash went to mama, who now wanted a new house. Meow put 200,000 baht in a bank account in her father’s name on the condition that he wouldn’t spend it until she raised the other 100,000 needed for the new home.
Meow moved into a tiny room for 3,000 baht a month and made do on her shrinking salary. In November, she collected 30,000 baht from Todd in Australia, but just 30,000 from the bar, tips and barfines.
At this rate, it was going to take a while to get the money for the house. There was still the pickup truck and her brother’s schooling to pay for each month. And Daniel’s brother demanded money monthly for the money-losing dive shop. All the while, her parents were contributing basically nothing. Rice prices plummeted this year, meaning that while papa earned 12 baht a kilo from his rice crop last year, this year it sold for just 4 baht a kilo.
Line in the Sand
Yet, despite all her obligations, Meow started to care less and less. She’d been selling herself at premium rates for the past two years and had virtually nothing to show for it. When she found out that last month that the family, despite their promises to the contrary, had spent half the 200,000 baht she’d put aside for the house, she made a decision.
300,000 baht. That was it. She’d get that, build the house and then tell mama and papa she would no longer support them. In a phone call in early December, she told her father she felt she’d done enough and that she was getting older and needed to start saving for her own life.
She also told her mother there was now a man in the picture, an American expat who started out as a customer way back when, became a friend and, now, a lover. He gave her what money he could, but his business was struggling, so the sums were not even close to what she could get off tourists. But she didn’t care. She quit her bar and moved in with him in December to save money until her sponsors begin to return Christmas week. In the meantime, she cleans and cooks for him every night and and claims to love him.
Meow said her parents accepted the news and were pleased she was with the American, who’d she’d talked about many times in the past. But it wasn’t long until her father was on the phone again. The first call brought news that there was another bank or loan shark he hadn’t mentioned before that was now demanding to be repaid. The total due? 300,000 baht. He wasn’t asking her to help, he explained. He just wanted her to know. Then, a week later, mama called again. Daddy wanted to build a new toilet. Meow thought it would cost less than 10,000 baht. Turns out her father needed 50,000 for the project.
Once she got the money from Aussie Todd, the entire payment went to Isaan.
So, this Christmas and New Year’s, Meow is staying again with Jan, who’s back in Pattaya for a month. He gave her 5,000 baht for shopping his first day here, bought her a new Nokia the second day and a half-baht gold bracelet the third. The cash will come later and that, too, will go to mama.
I, however, am spending this Christmas alone. Meow comes by every day for an hour or so. Sometimes we make love. Sometimes she just talks about Jan and Todd and Hans and the phone calls from papa. I try to focus on keeping the business afloat with no tourists in town and block out her “work.”
Part of me wants to rescue her from all of it. No man wants his “girlfriend” sleeping with other man, especially for money. But the rest of me knows the money train never really stops and that a relationship based on the Knight in Shining Armor Syndrome is a bad idea.
Perhaps 300,000 baht truly would satisfy this Isaan mother. But I can just as easily imagine a scenario in which, even if I paid off that familial debt, that it wouldn’t end. So, I’m stuck between the Scylla of having a working prostitute as a girlfriend and all the social baggage that goes with that, and the Charybdis of “doing the right thing” and making what could be a lifetime commitment to supporting not only her, but her family.
For now, I choose the former.
Damn Ghost I don’t know if I should feel sorry for you or smack you up side the head. This type of reality only seems to happen in Thailand and maybe that is how you should approach this problem. Remove yourself and ask if this were someone else what would you advise him. If this woman does really love you, and I’m sure on many levels she does, once she removes that anchor from around her neck I’m sure she will feel like a freed jailbird and only then will you know if she truly cares for you or if she just needs you like a security blanket. Fear not my fellow blogger your b-day is fast appoaching and then the turn of a new year will bring more clarity to all of this. Enjoy your holidays,try not to destroy your liver and stay true to yourself.
View all comments by burgerman
Great post! Interesting to see where she is coming from, where she’s been, and where she’s heading. What’s with these parents? What did they do for money before she was working?
Sounds almost like the reverse of what happens in the States. The kids are always demanding for more, but, just as Meow needs to do, the funds are eventually cut off.
View all comments by MunchMouth
Doesn’t seem like “Shades of Grey” to me! It is clearly black and white….
Totally agree with @bugerman! But after a second of thought - I would smack you upside your head in an effort to help you!
But we all have our stories living here and when a man cares about a woman - it is hard and almost impossible to “see the light” regardless of how “bright the light” is to everyone else!
For sure, stay true to yourself! You know deep down what the truth is - your just neglecting it a little bit now!
View all comments by JDH
PG: Great post, good luck, hope it works out for both of you.
View all comments by Riodon
Excellent post; thanks for sharing this.
As a Bangkok resident with an ex-gogo girl ‘gig’ (she’s sponsored by a rich old Dutchman who will soon take her to Holland), I can relate to your quandary.
The family will never stop leeching off her, and she will never stop shaggging for money when the cash flow gets tight.
The girls’ self-esteem is wrecked forever, and conflicting feelings of rage and love for her family tear her up emotionally. Many become alcoholics to numb the pain.
It’s pretty awful.
The most successful working girls, like Meow and my gig, once had amazing human potential: they are gorgeous, smart, charming and fast learners. Often with no experience outside their homve village, they step off a bus from the province, and immediately adapt and thrive in a warped, Dickensian dog-eat-dog environment.
If I can get off work early enough on Tuesday night, I will try to make it to your b-day bash. I’ve never been in to the Mango, but have been meaning to ever since I became familiar with the blog, which is a most excellent and entertaining resource. Kudos!
View all comments by Alan Smith
Among the many despicable aspects of life in Thailand is the frequency with which Thais pimp their own children to feed their greed, I should probably be used to hearing it by now. An airplane crashes and a village of of Thais loots the bodies. Savagery survives, even prospers in this place. The Land of Smiles, my ass.
View all comments by Old Asia Hand
does it sting to see this bad dudes name on her boob every time ya see her naked?
for an alleged smart girl its a pretty dumb thing to do.
View all comments by elliot
Hi Guys,
First thing, before the parade of “smack him or pity him” comments continue, I need to clear something up.
The first draft of this story did not have the ending it does now. I wanted this to be a story about her, the mothers of Isaan and the sad sponsors. Much as I feared, adding in the little surprise punch at the end took the focus away from that.
This is not a story about me. I’m not in love with the woman. Sure, I care about her and think highly of her, but I’ve made it explicitly clear to her that if she was unhappy with the money I give her — and, for the record, it was just 13,000 baht this month — she was free to leave anytime.
The live in situation is also likely temporary. It made no sense for her to keep her own place when she was only going to stay there 3 weeks, then be off a month with Jan, then a month with Hans and antoher 3 weeks with Todd. I’ve told her I prefer she has her own place and when the sponsors have gone home, she most likely will move back out.
I’ve had my heart broken by a gogo girl several years ago and learned much from that relationship. I have not opened myself up to that sort of emotional or financial risk again.
SO, with that disposed of, lets talk about her, her parents and the other guys….
@ JDH – I called this “Shades of Gray” in that is how I think her story comes across. She is not all good and not all bad. On one hand she’s merciless in exploting guys for cash. Hardened pro in that manner. Yet she’s increasingly unwilling to sleep around to get other cash.
Yet she’s still tender and caring toward some people. She calls her father a “good man” who is unlike many Thai men who cheat and leave their wives. He’s stayed with her mother for 25 years, despite constant harping from the wife.
And even her mother, who I’ve kind of demonized here, she refuses to say is all about money and that what she only wants is for Meow to be happy.
Her life I think is typical for many bargirls. They’re lives have no clear choices, only compromises. They are both heartless and merciful. What they do is both good and bad.
I think I painted her mother and the overseas sponsors in black, but Meow in a variety of grays. And certainly that’s the color of my situation with her as well.
@Alan — I honestly believe she will eventually break from them. Call me deluded, but her resolve is pretty strong.
@Elliott — At the end of November she went back home and had the name tattoo covered and changed into some flowers. But, yes, nice to see it gone. Everyone kept asking her if I was Daniel…
View all comments by Pattaya Ghost
Nice post. Have arrived and having fun in LOS and hope to shake your hand on Tuesday night.
Really enjoyed the story and I am sure many girls are the same. Here is another (much shorter) Picked a cute girl (mid 20s) in Madarin (worked at Spanky’s b4). Her story is a happy one for her. Parents think she is still in a factory so she only sends home 2,000 Bht a month..sometimes a bit more. Says that if she sends more she reckons they will suspect she is in a bar on the game…so she is happy and saving.. Will go back for more of her!
Mandarin (upstairs) stage was full of girls at 1 pm on Friday night.
Wents out with old flame on Saturday night so visited Angel witch. 2 new acts since last there in April.and fullup, but still it was Saturday. Girls love it and if you are carting it doesn’t cost a lot.
Have already bought a few drinks for the lovely Fon and Oh at Mango.. When the rest of the gang get here we will do the rounds big time and give a serious update on NEP and SC. Also visiting Pattaya fro first time for a few days early Jan,, so will need some advice on best places in just 2 nights stopover.
View all comments by 3amigos
OK, Mr Ghost: You’re deluded!
I’m really playing Devil’s advocate here, since sometimes bargirls do make that break, and I certainly don’t know enough about the nature of your relationship. But the probability is very, very low. Certainly you’re aware of this. Your 13K a month would be plenty enough for most of the girls out there who are ready to hang up their G-strings.
But when gogo girls get old they think they are gonna need their families more than ever, since they see themselves as damaged goods that no one would ever take care of in their old age or marry.
Of course it’s unjust that they invest so much in their families, who often waste it all on cockfights, lao whiskey and gold jewelry: they retire only to return to abject poverty in Isaan, despite 15 years of hawking their pussies to perverts.
For the record, I don’t pay my gig a single baht. She gets enough money from her sponsor. I am referred to as her ‘gig’, but her current sponsor, and past customers who she spent long periods of time with and paid for every single shag, are referred to as ‘boyfriends’. I know about them, they don’t know about me.
The difference is semantical: a working girl, or a girl who has worked, does not consider any man who does not compensate her with money as a relationship prospect.
Even if in many regards our relationship is more ‘pure’ in terms of mutual attraction, gratifying sex and depth of conversation, I am just a ‘gig’ because I will not sponsor or otherwise get seriously involved with a working girl–even if i broke that rule, she’d have to stop working because of personal choice and already be willing to sacrifice and work a regular job, rather than be ‘willing’ to stop working because of financial inducements from me.
My gig intends to milk as much as she can from the Dutchman, and then return to a modest family homestead in Isaan, complete with rice farm, houses and fish ponds, once she’s extracted enough cash from him.
I hope she manages to do this with minimal damage to her psyche. She’s already gone through periods of manic depression, as she dealt with the shame of her transformation from an innocent rice-farming virgin to a Nana whore.
She’s been nothing but sweet and up front with me, but if I was sponsoring her, she’d probably turn manipulative and dishonest in order to keep the money flowing.
View all comments by Alan Smith
To those that think she will break from her family, remember that blood is thicker than water. The obligation that all of the Thai women I have known have toward their parents and other relations is the hardest thing in the world to break.
Having been married for five years I tried to tell my wife that she was being conned, by her mother and other relatives. Just as soon as we broke up all of her relatives stopped calling, they knew that asking to borrow money was fruitless. When I asked her why they stopped calling she said that the only reason they called was to borrow money that they never had any intention of repaying.
The mothers con was always the same, they had no food to eat. The older sons kid didn’t have money to go to school, of course the older son had no job and wasn’t looking for one either.
Recently I had a little girl tell me that in March her father needed to have 50,000 baht, I wished her luck! That Issan family wedge is the hardest nut to crack and I know of no one that has completely done it.
View all comments by The Man
Well done Ghost. You’ve captured quite a bit here and the Comments seem to be flushing out the rest.
The more I stay here the less I want to be the Knight trying to save these poor innocent damsels in distress. There are exceptions of course but if you’re a farang looking for love these are shark infested waters so splashing around in the chum is not the best idea.
I’m not quite on the same “they are all savages” page as OAH but I won’t say he’s entirely wrong either. We are farang ATM’s to most of them. That’s pretty black and white. We make it gray with compassion and falling in love.
Who’s birthday is it tomorrow? That’s right, Tiger Woods.
View all comments by pmmp
So Ghost, if Daniel your brother? It kinda reads that way, but I am not very bright… :{
Good story. I kinda sensed that you were involved in some big way to know so much of Meow’s life in such detail too. Good luck.
View all comments by John Brown
Alan — Meow left for many months and I thought she was out of the scene forever, what with the 2 million and Daniel. I called her once back in January. Call ended abruptly. Once she returned to Pattaya and I caught up with her I found out that Daniel had taken her phone and thrown it out the window of the hotel when he found out it was me.
On her return we picked up where we left off. I bacame the “gik” (which sounds closer to the pronunciation than “gig”). She’d go to work and come sleep at my place if she didn’t have a barfine. I paid her 1,000 in the morning for week or two then slowly stopped paying or just gave her a few hundred to eat. It’s an evolving process of ending the customer relationship and going to something else.
I gave her 10K on the 1st as I’d not paid anything for like a week or so at the end of Nov. She had to send 5K to pay for the truck and teh sponsors had not yet ponied up.
Now that she’s working with her overseas guys, I won’t be paying anythign for her in Jan-March. Christ, she made almost as much as I did in Dec.!
The story here comes from our many conversations over the past eight weeks. It’d been rolling aorund in my head for a while and with each new anecdoate, I knew a good story was in the making. There’s so much that really tugs at me and, of course, think is great fodder for comments:
* How girls get the short shrift in Isaan
* How a bright girl is denied a chance
* How some guys think they “own” the girls and can do what they want simply by the money they pay.
* How hypocricy of parents who deride their daughters for becoming whores then, once they are, keep pushing for more.
* The failure of the parents to take responsibility for their own lives and finance and, instead, make it their children’s problem.
* What the fuck is going on in the minds of these guys e-mailing, calling and sending cash.
Lots of gray out there…
View all comments by Pattaya Ghost
@Ghost - If I offended you an any way - that was never my intention!
Whoever reads this post of yours sees your sincerity, feelings and emotions for this person within her “merry-go-around” family and sponser relationships.
Maybe, I read through the lines, or your lines “sparked” some emotions that I still carry as a result of being involved with someone here (I have been BKK almost 12 years).
There are always choices - Isaan or “Bed Stoy” (NY) for people to make! She made a decision - I don’t feel sorry for her, family, or the guys she is “milking”!
What I felt was your emotions!
After Christmas “walk-around”!
Went to Charlie Browns Friday evening - absoutely no one in the restaurant - I still ate and drank to many marguritis!
Saturday went to Florence on Snirakin - fantastic! Got a lot of attention - only farang in the place - a fair amount of the gals eager to talk! Left with two and stopped in a couple more Thai joints on the way to Secon- drank and ate some more and went home - fricking hung (both heads) Sunday morning!
Went to Soi 4 (Sunday) last night to get a hamburger on the soi - waited in Morning Nite while they cooked the burger about 20 farangs!
Walked to Bamboo Soi 3 to get some take-away lamb chops (not cooked - will do myself) half empty….
Up Suk - stopped in Sanuk - about 5 people - then to New Wave (almost empty except the everyday freelancers), Beer Garden about 10 farangs, Absolute on Soi 7/1 about 10 people - shit - have never seen these bars on lower Suk so empty - but I am not down there a lot!
Happy Birthday - Ghost!!!
View all comments by JDH
jdh - clearly u ate from the wrong burger place and waited in the wrong bar but I will let that pass. I hope the lamb does not do u in.
can u dish more on florence? I need the info. thanks!
View all comments by sideshowBOB
@Ghost - This was great read, best thing Ive read on here for a long while.
I find it near impossible to wrap my head round how cold and demanding the parents can be. The notion that they openly encourage their daughters to flog their mutton to fat old whiteguys, so they can gain face by flaunting their cheap gold and new houses to their issan neighbours baffles me.
Makes me wonder what the girl Meow will be like as a mother after 20+ years of the bargame has taken its toll
View all comments by Young Penfold
You pay a whore 13K to do a bit of cleaning every month, jeez I have two kids and we pay our maid 10K per month she does all the house work/cooking plus helps my wife look after the kids. Sure she doesn’t suck my cock however maybe if I offer her 3K extra she will, wait on, on second thoughts that’s a bad idea. My advice is keep your 13K and either spend it at your favorite bar or on trips to the soapies, in reality she should be giving you money for rent and board. Yes we have all heard the hard luck bright girl from Isaan stories before however there is ‘no fate but what you make’ I am sure some of the Isaan girls working in MK, Swenson’s or any retail store or factory would have bleeding hearts for Meow, like fuck they would. Your 13K per month is better spent changing someone’s life for the better that does not sleep with strangers for a living. As for the desperate losers sending money to her from abroad hopefully they read this blog.
View all comments by Norbert
i don’t understand how you can finance a whore from afar and expect her to keep it on ice until your return. Yer right. I know of quite a few guys who do it, even buy them appartments to live in and do there 2 to 3 months a year stay. And when they’re in town they seem happy not to use a condom, as they expect that the girl has been true. Well better them than me. I would ruther rent one out for a while. Have the time of my life, as in most cases it is. Think about them when i return for a few weeks or month. As you can’t help but devlop feeling towards them as they treat you so well. On your return give them a call and it’s on again. Great post, well done.
View all comments by Tails
Nice post Ghost, thanks for sharing and putting yourself up for the inevitable advice(kicking) you’ll receive. I’m currently acting as an unpaid advisor for Nana Gogo dancer. What she really needs is Personal assistant to juggle her sponsors and prospective husbands what with all the phone calls, visa requests ,bank transfers and concurrent visits its very stressful for her. Then there is her rather large family and its demands though I must say her parents seem better than the average. That’s why the girls like to sleep so much -only peace they get. Happy Birthday BTW.
View all comments by Wenthworth
Wonderful post Ghost, as always. You’ve hit on a number of really interesting topics. The Thai bargirl’s life, the travelling Farang who falls in love after a week, and the ex-pat / working man in Thailand who knows better. It has always amazed me that these young ladies, with little formal education, can pick up the English language (even if it does take a lot of studying) and how some still have a thirst for knowledge. It’s more amazing that men can fall in love with a working girl they’ve known for only a week. But then again, it’s not too difficult to believe - the ladies are beautiful, fun, treat us like we’ve never been treated before. And then there are those who live there full time, who know the score. You may not “love” her (what exactly is love anyways ?) but you certainly have deep feelings for her - and every man, whether he admits it or not, wants to be the knight in shining armor - we all want to be heroes.
Can anyone give me a definition of love ?
View all comments by Calvin
Have never been involved with a bargirl, but have dated a few strippers in my time. Odd situation. ‘How was your day at work?’ ‘Pretty good, sweetie, worked out a really tricky logic problem at the database level so it’s wicked fast, no need to hit the app front end. How about you?’ ‘Great, did ten songs with one guy who just loved my tits.’
Anyway, great post, and keep working those shades of gray, the black and white world isn’t all that interesting.
View all comments by tosh
Great Read PG. Sorry I missed out on the birthday celebration.
It is truly amazing how far these sponsors will go and do just to keep their little piece of the Thai Pie. Here is a perfect example:
I have been with my on/off Thai GF for about 16 months now. We met over two years ago. About 3 months after she met, she came crying to me one day, saying in a month she was off to Germany to get married and live in Germany with her new husband. He was a ‘good man’ and had known her for a year or so, and had made a few trips to see here here in Thailand. He is 57, she is 26. Pretty standard deal. After a few rounds of tears, she heads of to Germany never to be seen again, or so I thought. After about a 3 weeks I get a surprising call from her, and she breaks down over the phone, telling be how unhappy she is, misses me, and misses Thailand. She has yet to be married, however she still plans on getting married. Although I missed her a ton, I tell her she has to do whats best for her and it’s her decision. So she tells her fiance how she misses Thailand and wants to go back, but that she will still marry him, if he wants. They get married a week later, and 3 days after that she is on a plane back to Thailand. (This was July of last year) Now back in Thailand, we decide to live together and attempt to have somewhat of a normal relationship. It’s all good until, Mr. Germany pays his annual visit to Thailand. Along with him he brings a half a million baht for the Isaan family house..etc. etc.. So she joins up with him then, and they travel around Thailand together, but her conscience gets the best of her, and she tells him about me. His 1st thought is to jump on a plane and head back to Germany. But she someone performs some magic and stays with the program. So a month, into his two month stay here, she rejoins me after securing him a small apt. not too far away. Fast-forward one year. He is here once again, on his annual trip, she spends the days with him, and nights with me. It’s crazy. He knows all about me, and I know all about him. (I know this for sure because I have seen SMS’s from him, talking about me and mentioning me by name) He still gives her and the family money, even though he knows she loves me.(or so she says) I don’t give her any money at all, however I take care of all of her expenses. She does need to use her own money. She is lazy and does not work, preferring to take his money for the family, so it would be stupid for me to give her a dime. My guess is that one day she will end up with him, sooner or later, as money always wins, and pressure from the family will finally win out. The point of my story is that even when these sponsors know that some other dude is screwing their wife they still pony up. Unbelievable! I get his point though, he loves her dearly and knows that if he throws around enough money, he will one day have her all to himself. He plans on retiring here in a year or so as it is.
I also had a nice idea. Since we have a new government, I would like to propose a new law: A large poster-size photo will be required to be prominently displayed in every single new Isaan house. This picture will be of these parents’ daughters, completely naked, and bent over showing all. The words above the poster shall display in large letters “DONATED BY” This way each and every person who enters that house knows exactly how this house came to be.
View all comments by I Phukit
@I Phukit
“I don’t give her any money at all, however I take care of all of her expenses.”
I really don’t get it. You either give the girl money, or you dont. It’s just a matter of degree, I don’t see how you can be so incredulous over the German guy, when it would appear from your post that you are sponsoring (and enabling) her as well. Maybe he has so much money that relatively speaking, the money he gives her is proportional to what you give her ‘for expenses’ compared to your income.
View all comments by Alan Smith
Love is a chemical reaction designed to ensure the survival of the human race.
View all comments by Young Royal
My first visit to Bangkok and Pattaya was over 30 years ago,the first evening in Patpong and inside a gogo bar sat drinking singa and totally freaked out by seeing beautiful girls in very little costumes.Looking into one of the corners of the room I noticed a guy with his thai wife/girlfriend looking at me and smiling,after about 10 minutes he came over and started to talk,he said”you looking for a wife or long time friend son”I said no,he carried on”let me give you a bit of advice if you want a thai girl as your wife find one that does not speak english and has no or very little family” on asking why he replied, “1 if the girl speaks english she has either worked in some bar or gogo,2 the family are the girl and your worst enemy they will sponge any money you and the girl will ever have example ,rice crop failure buffalo dying brother in law needs motorcycle to get to the toilet etc”.I kept to this idea for a good number of years untill I meet Soopaa in Pattaya she was absolutely gorgeous in every way and she managed to get £3k from me over about 2 years saying she had to look after her sick mother, pay for her 2 kids schooling ,could not afford electric and water bills.I fell for it hook line and sinker the kids by the way were her brothers found out the truth about her by going to Rayong where she lived with a thai speaking friend and discretely asking about her and family in the neighborhood I dumped her in a week of remorse and drunken stupor.3 Years on met another girl just as beautiful,worked as a linen girl in a small hotel in Sisaket, married her within 3 months brought her back to uk and we are still lovingly together 23 years later(she could not speak a word of english by the way)Point of the story is to look further afield, than the bars and gogos for nicer and honest girls.
View all comments by tobytke
@ Calvin
What is the definition of love? An emotion that is easily mistaken for lust by the male who travels or lives in Thailand.
View all comments by tapeets117
That’s definately one definition for Thailand, Tapeets117. Which is just what I was thinking - there is no “right” definition - what’s the difference between strong feelings and love ? Esp in Thailand
View all comments by Calvin
@ ghost - I’m not understanding something, perhaps I’m being naive or still drunk. You’ve mentioned before that you have a Mrs Ghost. Is she your wife and this is your side salad?
@ pmmp - You’re a nice guy and all but considering you have been banging Isaan girls for years and even pmmp’ing them out, did you ever really want to save them?
To put it politely Isaan folks are an odd breed and think differently. The biggest mistake guys make when coming here is to give out phone numbers and e-mails to working girls. Keep the transaction clean and simple. If not, it leads to endless drama with the guy eventually being the loser. Before coming here from farangland I think most guys would have never considered themselves want to be associated with (let alone marrying) a 3rd world prostitute.
@ 3amigos - After your shameless promotion of the fleapit hellhole called “The Ring” I will be overjoyed when you refund my 2000THB at tonight’s birthday party. Just deduct it from this month’s commission.
View all comments by Chevy Chase
@AS In RE to: “I don’t give her any money at all, however I take care of all of her expenses.” and “I really don’t get it. You either give the girl money, or you don’t. It’s just a matter of degree”
There is a huge, massive difference in giving a girl money and taking care of her expenses. I pay for our rent, food, and bills and that’s about it. I do not give her cash, and therefore the family never looks to me for money because I am “keenyowe” There is not too much of a difference, financially than it would be if I were living along. The way I see it, I am saving money, by not whoring around (as much) So it’s a bargain for me.
Here is my point. If you take care of expenses for your Thai Girl, then she does not need money. If she wants to send money to the family get a regular job and send all of it home every month. It seems pretty simple to me.
View all comments by I Phukit
i - I never really understand when people get all up in arms over the whole sponsorship thing. I have ALWAYS found it silly for people who don’t live here to take care of a girl they don’t see much. I have written about this many times but Thai girls just get lonely and it is pretty easy for a sponsored girl to have the time to juggle some guys on the side when the main sponsor is not around much. However I am thankful every time I connect with a sponsored girl who needs some luvin. Those doing the remotes sponsoring - either resolve yourself that she may screw around on u or spend a small percentage of your sponsor money and hire a PI to be sure.
That aside - for guys living here. I think sponsorship can work out really well if you work it right. Cab be much cheaper than the whoring but afford a lifestyle that a normal GF probably would not allow. Having been on both sides of it many times I think the sponsorship route saves me money, get me plenty of action and is low stress. It all just depends on how you work it but I don’t think it should be so heavily denounced.
View all comments by sideshowBOB
PG let me first say that was a great post, honest and interesting. I am married to a Thai women who I met here in the states, been to LOS a few times so I have some experience here. All I know is many Thai women love the drama, some even thrive on it. Many of my wife’s friends has some drama going on in their lives and it never stops to the point that my wife gets a headache from it all,then we laugh about it and move on.
Tosh,
I have also had my stripper girlfriends and it is very similar to many of the Thai gogo’s just from different parts of the world (Russia,Chech,D.R.) all needing money to send home. The same story new face and I got tired of it all after I put one cutie from the Bahamas through “college” but what a body….anyway moving on.
The point of it all is that the women in this scene are sharks it’s in their DNA and the best way to not get bitten is to stay out of the water. There are many fantastic Thai women who would go to the end of the world for their man, go find them. When you get out of that scene the view is great, come on out.
View all comments by burgerman
b - good points but as pmmp says - some people want a poodle and some people want a pit bull. If you KNOW what u are dealing with then u can approach properly. In P4P the beauty is in getting what u want but for me I think the coolness of being in thailand is working all sides - sometimes at the same time.
View all comments by sideshowBOB
Another great post Ghost,
Enjoyed reading that story about your tgf. But there are so many that cannot send any money to their families. As they have Jaba habits, it all goes to supporting their habits. Had a very sexy chinese bkk girlfriend when I stayed at RA-JAH Mansion in Nana. I sent her out to work for her habit and took care of her expenses like phone card, pool, food, cigarrets and a place to stay. As soon as she had a customer the money she earned went up in smoke. She never had a penny to send her family. One day she told me I could not take care of her, Ya Right. She was shocked when I told her, I was spending 14,000 a month on her, not to mention a roof over her head. She had no idea. I did feel a little bad having to kick her out for the sixth and final time for not keeping her friends out of my room while I was out. You know how much stuff you loose when that happens.
Ssb you asked about Florenc club. I went there about three years ago and had no idea it was still there. I remember some great talent there and happened to still have the address. 918-924 Srinakarin RD., Kweang Suanluang, Suanluang. Telephone 0 2320 0259-60. From Nana, I remember paying about a 100 bht to Florence and seeing the expresion on the taxi drivers face after paying them the price they quoted me. Not only, did they not know how difficult it was to find, but how far to get there. Happy Birthday Ghost and a New Year for the Mango gang! Wish I was there, Enjoy!
View all comments by Ed in Hawaii
I have ’sponsored’ TGs here before (twice) and may yet do it again. As ssB suggested, I found it to be more economical (no bar fines, lady drinks, hotel costs, etc) and generally a good value, as the girls would do my laundry and cook for me (I found, though, that I was a fussier housekeeper than the girls). I never found it difficult to be monogamous while living with them; having one girl at home willing to give me sex on demand is fine with me… I’m not that big on variety.
Getting rid of them when I tire of the arrangement is the real problem. I actually expected the second girl to tire of me within six months or so and go back to the chrome pole on her own. I was shocked when she fell in love and wanted to get married instead. The sex and her cooking was good enough for me to think about it, but I just couldn’t handle the 12 hours a day of sleeping that she did.
I can’t imagine that men overseas think that by sending cash to their girls they are keeping them out of other men’s beds. I can chime in with the thousands of others with dozens of true stories of stroking naked girls while they chat with their sponsors in English assuring him that they are at home watching TV. You don’t keep bar girls out of the bar by sending them money, you simply increase their income.
View all comments by Werewolf
sad but true, the girls start by helping a little, but never enough
I have only known one bar girl that really had a plan .. she gave her parents just enough to live on and saved the rest.. this was back in the early 90’s and she was making B50K or so a month (at the time a lot)
she was not the best looking girl, but when you were with her, it was special .. and she never asked me for extras.. even when I suggested we become a couple.. her answer, all farangs cheat, she would rather stay single .. probably smart??
anyway, she saved enough to buy land up near her home in Chaing Rai, she got a pickup, built a house and went there to be a farmer with her child and parents.. she had extra money in the bank for backup
Thai’s as a rule just don’t plan .. I still find it hard to deal with as my current girlfriend still does not plan well.. after over seven years of my prodding her to do so..
fortunately, she has a great job and has managed to save quite a bit over the last 5 years .. so she will be able to retire in a few years, without my having to support her ..
My guess is Meow does not make it, she didn’t start with limiting her parents and now will not be able to do it.. a shame, she will end up one of the older whores just getting by
I have seen this many times.. there used to be a girl at Thermae, we used to call her the Queen of Thermae as she would walk in and have her choice of almost any guy there… then she got knocked up.. had the kid, was no longer 20 but 25 and walked in to Thermae and got few looks, just joined the crowd of older girls hoping for a good score ..
too bad they don’t have a training class for the girls fresh from the country, they could use it
View all comments by oaktoad
Thanks again Ghost. Love your work. Appreciate the personal touch in this one. Take care now. Jon.
View all comments by Jon_Snow
Hi guys. Did the Pattaya birtday rounds last night, collecting all the free drinks these bar owners owed me. Quite a little headache, but nothing compared with tomorrow’s probably…
@JDH — No offense taken
@YP — Thannks a lot. But I think she won’t be in the game much longer. Some guy is gonna snap her up.
@Norbet — Nice first comment. It’s nice to see you have such tact and a clear understanding of the facts….
@Calvin — My comment above was probably a bit too brusque. I said “I don’t love her” and left it at that, but what I mean is that if she left tomorrow, I wouldn’t be heartbroken. Sure, I care about her and don’t want to see her taken advantage of by anyone. And she’s one of the very few bargirls I actually enjoy spenidng time out of bed with. But I”m not jealous she’s with someone else or when she gets a call/sms/e-mail from them; not pining for her when she’s not here and would not be bothered particularly if she left.
@Phukit — Great story and pretty damn similar to me. The 3 overseas guys know about me and my name as well. She makes no secret that she’s with me, although she hasn’t told 2 of them she lives with me. The guy here now knows about me as well and that Sunday night she spent the night with me. (Actually she just left after coming here to give me my “birthday present” (wink)).
@ALan — Why so bitter man? There is a difference, as Phukit explains, between cash outlays and simply taking care of room and board. I’ve told Meow what I will pay for and what I won’t. I buy food when we eat together and entertainment when we go out together. I don’t pay for phone cards or shoes, etc. Buying non-essentials comes out of her pocket. Things we share I pay for. As for the cash I have given her, it’s considerably less than I’d be paying if she wasn’t here and I was out on the prowl, paying barfines and lady drinks. And, since she cooks for me pretty much 5 nights a week, I’m saving a ton on restaurants, as I eat farang food when alone and she cooks only Thai food. So between the bargirls and resturants, I might even be saving money paying her the 13K.
@Chevy — Mrs. Ghost is her, or whoever the current Gik or GF is. Just a cutesy way of saying it.
@Burger — thanks!
@Ed — So true and so sad. I’d never have anything more than a short-time with a girl I kneww to be a user, tho.
@WW — I know the move-out day will come. Just crossing my fingers its her idea.
@Oak — Smart girl. Met a few like her. Unfortunately, Meow is not a planner either.
View all comments by Pattaya Ghost
“@ pmmp - You’re a nice guy and all but considering you have been banging Isaan girls for years and even pmmp’ing them out, did you ever really want to save them?”
@Chevy: First of all, who said I’m a nice guy? Please, if that lie ever gets out I’ll be ruined.
As for saving them, yes, as I mentioned though I am less and less inclined to do so the longer I stay here. I think many of us go through this as we peel back the layers. Knowing more has it’s downsides though. It was kind of nice being ignorant of what a bargirl really is and what motivates here. This blog has ruined that for me.
The Knight in Shining Armor used to be a noble cause in my mind. The Knights I see nowadays though look like a bunch of ignorant fools for the most part. Am I happier for knowing this? Not really. Still dig the LBFM’s though, just in a different way now. Less of a Knight more of a Consumer these days. Although, there is #59 at Rainbow 1 that is different. She told me she just started working there and has only done oral so far with generous Japanese guys. I need to save her and her allegedly unused vagina…okay, just kidding.
View all comments by pmmp
@SSB - Ed in Hawaii is correct with the address. I have a “leaflet” type brochure thing I was given there - but I cannot read Thai. I will have it translated and posted here to you.
Easiest way for you to get there (or better yet I will take you) is to get on the Skytrain at Nana and get off at On Nut (25 baht). Take the exit on the side of Tesco and hop in a taxi and tell the driver Srinakarin RD which you will take Sukhumvit 77 or out here it is called On Nut.
You cannot miss Srinakarin RD and just tell the driver to turn left on Srinakarin. Florence is about 1 1/2 mile on the left. You will pass (believe it or not) an A&W (remember in the states - curly fries and pretty good burgers!)
If you hit On Nut in a Taxi any time around 5 - 7 PM - traffic is miserable! But from On Nut to Florence won’t be any more than about 80 baht.
It is a HUGE place (cannot miss) with the parking lot full of Mercedes, BMR’s… at least when I have been there. That gives a little idea about the place… The Florence has had a couple of names in the last couple of years, Florence - Venise, Venice but now back to Florence. I also pass this place every evening on my way home from work and there always seems to be a lot of activity there!
The food is good but there are so many women in there - I reckon when I was last there about 150 - 200 and probably more hidden out doing what they do! I usually go with a couple of Thai guys I know really well and they have a sneaky way of getting for me what I want! I will bring them along with us! There have always been a bunch of women there when I have been there and maybe this last weekend was not normal - but what a sight!
There are a couple of other Thai places I go to out here and one is in an apartment complex, not too big, but definitly some great lookers in there.
For me, I prefer the Thai places, all I go to these days with the exceptional “walk around” lower Suk once every 6 months or so. You dress nice, have a smile, treat people the way you wanted to be treated, have a good attitude and you can have a GREAT, GREAT TIME!
View all comments by JDH
jdh - thanks. to be clear is it a massage parlour - entertainment complex - g club? I am assuming a big thai style massage place/fish bowl?
View all comments by sideshowBOB
Phukit, Ghost:
I didnt think I was being bitter, just disagreeing with the moral relativity of it all.
Different strokes, do what you feel gents, so long as no one is kidding themselves and nobody’s getting hurt.
The idea that you’re saving money with a modest sponsorship/subsidy makes sense to me–most of us are not going to shag a pretty girl most every day for a month in BKK on 13-14K a month.
View all comments by Alan Smith
as - that is the point good value for the money and if they cook or clean. bonus. bring girls over for a party then the hidden value kicks in.
View all comments by sideshowBOB
Can I get on at Phrom Phong? It’s closer to my room and costs a bit less.
View all comments by Werewolf
On the whole sponsorship/taking care of expenses debate…….
I was living with my GF earlier this year. She went to Uni in Asok and her folks sent her X amount a month to rent an apartment and a small allowance to live on. I moved into her apartment and took over the rent, tossed her a few baht every now and again for clothes/make-up, topped up her MRT card etc. Where does all this fall? Sponsoring? Taking Care?
The whole relationship wasnt based on me giving her cash. Shes 21 and im 24 after all. Grey area perhaps?
View all comments by Young Penfold
- YP, I reckon she’d of hoofed you out if you’d stopped paying.
You spoiled her. You should have made her pay your rent and you should have used HER make-up.
If she didn’t comply…. well, you know what to do….
View all comments by Daywalker
I paid the rent, but I didn have first dibs on her black nail polish and mascara. Sadly her white cotton panties were just a tad too small
I was actually banging a filthy rich girl who had digs on Suk20, Thong Lo and BangSue, after we split, and she literally threw cash at me (to keep my clothes on)
Shame she was an annoying bitch who loved the sound of her own voice, was a squib in the sack, and not much to look at. Now I know how the BGs feel when they go with you DW
View all comments by Young Penfold
YP… so you have a constant sore arse then?
View all comments by Daywalker
“She’s been nothing but sweet and up front with me, but if I was sponsoring her, she’d probably turn manipulative and dishonest in order to keep the money flowing.”
An interesting thought and one I wish I had read a few months ago. The Sponsorship label was a new one to me until I found out recently that I was one! I had been a customer of a really sweet fun smart girl for a while and at some point I thought to myself that I was getting tired of all the different girls and wanted to sort of “settle down” with one girl. And since I had found myself going with her most of the time I decided on her. So when I came back to BK for a lengthy stay I made my thoughts known to her and she seemed fine with that and I began to give her money so that she didn’t have to look elsewhere. It seemed fair to me - she has to live and I wanted her to be happy and secure. At some point though she refers to me as her sponsor when I thought I was her boyfriend. Ouch. A big difference I realized. This was business. When I told another girl about this she said that was a terrible thing to call me - it meant she only wanted your money and wanted no relationship bond. And over a period of a few months she did get increasingly manipilative and I believe dishonest to keep the money flowing. I finally broke it off because it wasn’t what I was looking for. Her last sms was a plea for 30,000 baht as a goodbye kiss. And she really is a sweet kid but the easy money was more than she could resist. I can’t blame her at all. Only me.
View all comments by Drronin
Drronin.
Yeah, kinda sounds like you went through what most of us have!
View all comments by Daywalker
Beautiful story, Ghost, and I see many shades of grey…just as I did when I lived in Bangkok.
I don’t have any specific advice on sponsorship/relationships or whatever, other than if you’re hopelessly in love with a Thai working girl, chok dii! It all seems to go better if all parties are level-headed.
And don’t assume that things are the same as in the West. It’s commonplace for Thais to view their offspring as chattel, and however we farang feel it about it, frankly, isn’t going to change their minds.
@ OAH: love your comments, as always. But I must mention that Thailand is not the only country where aircrash-victims are looted. I’m not saying that Thais always behave admirably, far from it. Just that it’s not one of humanity’s finer points, nor is it limited to Thailand.
All the best and I loved the foto of her wrapped in a towel checking her email. I let one of mine use my computer once to check her email and somehow managed to remember the password-keystrokes. Very interesting reading.
JtB
View all comments by Jack the Bat
“Yeah, kinda sounds like you went through what most of us have!”
Yup, which is what makes it all so silly. I’ve been coming to Thailand for years and had heard all the stories and read all the books and thought I was too smart to let it happen to me. But then you find a girl that for unknown reasons burrows her way into your heart and so when she tells you she hates the life, you believe her, when she tells you she wants to get out of the life , you believe her, when she tells you that you have changed her life, you believe her - but the requests for the money just keep on coming and coming like an AM radio playing the greatest hits.
View all comments by Drronin
Well written, ‘Ghost’.
Anyone connecting with this should take the time to read (and I mean ‘read’ rather than watch the albeit good movie) “Breakfast At Tiffany’s” by Truman Capote.
Your Meow is a modern-day Holly Golightly if ever there was one - and you are the equivalent of the narrator. We have all been there, or if we have not we shall; unless we have hearts of lead.
HNY, and God rest the soul’s of those poor people last night.
View all comments by redstar
Ghost - really good read, and like many others commenting i hear you. I hope it all works out. There’s no right or wrong answers.
Also, (sorry for the trivia) but I find it interesting u say she is from isaan, as i didnt think petchabun people were ok with being associated with those from the other side of the mountains.
View all comments by Mr Carpet
what girl 100.000 a month it must be like a jar of worms
View all comments by udon expat thailand
MC - Still the northeast and most women I’ve met there, P4P or no, seem to refer to themselves as Isaan.
UET - Not so much.
View all comments by Pattaya Ghost
Ghost, happy to see you blogging again, although a little dissappointed to read the story, when you originally gave up your own PG blog it was for the love of a ‘good girl’in Bangkok, what happened?
Anyway, good luck for the future and stay happy.
View all comments by materialsman
M — Not blogging often. As for the other, bad girls can be much more fun.
View all comments by Pattaya Ghost
Ghost, say no more! I think we all eventually endu p in the same mindset, hell, it costs us an arm and a leg either way, who needs the added drama when a ‘nice girl’ starts sulking, unbelievable drama queens all of em, eh?
View all comments by materialsman
If you want a relation with a Thai girl/woman don’t get involved with the gogo’s or beerbars.
Pimper’s Paradise lyrics
She love to party, have a good time
She looks so hearty, feeling fine
She loves to smoke, sometime shifting coke
She’ll be laughing when there ain’t no joke
A pimper’s paradise, that’s all she was now
A pimper’s paradise, that’s all she was
A pimper’s paradise, that’s all she was
Every need got an ego to feed
Every need got an ego to feed
BOB MARLEY
View all comments by Renee
@Renee-
Amazing that you quoted that particular Marley song. I quoted the exact song and lyrics to friends of mine…I think that song is a perfect reflection of the madness.
View all comments by Indu WangZi