The other day I was taking the plastic off the Durex boxes I just bought before putting them in my little “sex paraphernalia” drawer next to my bed. I do this because taking the plastic off when in the moment can be a very awkward and deflating experience. I thought to myself “This is something I NEVER did when I lived in the US”. With that in mind I’m going to kick off this week’s “not-so” weekly Weekly with the “Top Ten Things I do in Bangkok that I NEVER did when I lived in the US”:
#10: Prep my Durex boxes
#9: Consider a 28 year old girl too old to mash daisies with
#8: Walk around town with a chronic chubby
#7: Provide relief funds for many sick buffaloes in Isaan
#6: Turn down 3-somes on a regular basis (and believe me, I’m no Brad Pitt)
#5: Get excited about the start of English Premier League Football
#4: Blow off an Asian-American Pornstar because I can easily do better
#3: Relegate masturbation to a very rare occurence
#2: After I get a BJ check to see if the person giving me the BJ has a penis
and the number one thing I NEVER did when I lived in the US:
#1: Pimp
What are some of the things you do here that you never do back home?
This week:
Bangkok Bar/Go-Go Update
After Hours Update
Thai Phrase of the Week
Tales From The Street
Big Mango Bar Update
Upcoming Events
Bangkok Bar/Go-Go Update
Bars were open on the 18th and 19th. Apparently intoxicated voters are more acceptable if it’s just a referendum being voted on. Police were out tonight rounding up Freelancers on Suk Soi 4 and the Nana Hotel Parking Lot. I guess they needed some extra cash. Weird seeing no Freelancers on the street. It was like a bad dream. An hour later the Police were gone and the little Angels returned to their posts.
Nana Entertainment Plaza
Closing times remain 2:00am.
- Morning Night. Recently remodeled, the Suk Soi 4 bar now has 2 Cameras at their entrance. I couldn’t believe it when I heard but sure enough they are there.
- Mandarin. Probably my favorite GoGo in Nana right now. Great music and loads of gals.
Soi Cowboy
Closing times remain 2:00am.
- Sheeba’s. Nice lineup.
- Shark. Tons of talent and great music still.
- Dollhouse. Some real stunners and they continue to deliver on the big boobie gals
Other
- Forte on RCA. Mostly Thai. My buddy has a membership so we headed over for a few. They’ve remodeled the place. Weird setup. You used to be able to see the stage from everywhere. Now they’ve put it in the back and the Coyote dancing stage is now in the middle. When we arrived the girls were doing there normal Coyote dancing on dance stage. Then the Thai band came on for a set and the girls went away. This made no sense to me. Why not have the girls continue to dance on their Coyote stage. I tried asking the Mamasan but she kept saying “Band come on, Dancers stop”.
After Hours Update
- Spicy on Ron Muang Soi 1. Still the best option but things are starting to change. Weekends are HORRIBLE, weekdays still great. Mostly guys on the weekends and way too packed. Also, their cigarette prices just went up from 100 to 200 baht and the Tequila has made a few people sick including me. The problems may be a result of their success. More taxis are taking guys who are looking for a “Bar Open”.
- The Tunnel on Lang Suan Soi 5. Raging. Great crowd and great House music. However, a few early closures still make it an unpredictable experience.
- Spice on Suk Soi 11. Doing solid business but crowd is pretty lame. Weekends are HORRIBLE. Too many guys like at Spicy. Hitting smaller venues like Tequila Dragon or DEO Club on Suk Soi 5 above Foodland, or The After Club on Patpong 2 are better Weekend options.
- Tequila Dragon on Suk Soi 7/1. You can hear crickets chirping. Spice Club on Suk Soi 11 has essentially destroyed them.
Thai Phrase of the Week
This week we learn the Thai phrase for “Have you put it in yet?” - “Sai Laow Ru Yang”
“Sai” - put in
“Laow” - already
“Ru” - or
“Yang” - yet
Hopefully you hear this before you actually put it in and not after.
Tales From The Street
Tale1: Met a 21 year-old guy from Los Angeles who’s father lives in the Philippines and was in Bangkok visiting for the first time with his brother. As many of you know, the Philippines sex bars do things a bit different. When you pay the bar to take a girl it’s generally all-inclusive meaning it’s a bar-fine and short-time/long-time all in one price. Well, Mr. 21 year old wanders into Rainbow 4 and is delighted to hear from the Mamasan that the gorgeous little Japanese-looking schoolgirl would only cost him 600 baht. After they finished he was puzzled when the girl asked for 2000 baht. He had no clue that the bar fine here is to just take the girl from the bar. He only had 900 baht on him and the girl accepted that. Pretty good deal but please don’t try this at home.
Tale2: Punter A who reads the blog came by and told me about how he wanted to check out Spicy on Ron Muang Soi 1. The taxi though took him to Stardust instead which is a horrible after hours place that gives the taxis a nice kickback. When you hear the taxi/tuk-tuk guys on the street say “Bar Open” they will usually take you to the place where they get the biggest kickback, Stardust is one of these places. Some will take you to Spicy since they get a kickback there too but others must get a better deal from Stardust because they seem to by default take more people there. Amazingly, the Punter reported that he had a good time at Stardust. I’ve been to Stardust on a research project once. It’s a small and scary looking place and they typically have 7-8 girls sitting next to each other at the back of the bar waiting to be selected. The Punter selected a nice one apparently and it was 3000 baht for long time. This may seem expensive but this is an After Hours place and they do have to pay the police so one would expect a higher rate. He was very pleased with the experience. I avoid the place like the plague but good to hear that he didn’t get ripped off.
Quote1: “Ladyboy’s can have baby but only one”. Thai working girl…and she was serious
Quote2: “So how much for the whole goddamn Elephant?” - I cracked up when I heard this from a drunk Punter talking to the owner of one of the Suk Soi 4 Elephants that traverse the Soi looking for “feed me” money
Quote3: “The best thing to ever come out of America is The Grateful Dead” - A friend
Big Mango Bar Update
- Our 2-Year Anniversary Party will be on September 1st. More details to come but it will be a bash so come on by
- Runners from the World Hash House Harriers (http://www.gthhh.com/ their motto: “Hashing is a state of mind- a friendship of kindred spirits joined together for the sole purpose of reliving their childhood or fraternity days, releasing the tensions of everyday life, and generally, acting a fool amongst others who will not judge you or measure you by anything more than your sense of humor”) bar crawled/ran into the Mango last Friday night. Coincidentally they were wearing the same colors as the Mango Girls. Nobody tried to barfine them though. Some pics:
- Big Mango Kitchen Specials:
o Pork Caraway Patties with Egg on top, Home Fried Potatoes, and a Side Salad - 195 baht
o Tacos and Nachos now on the Menu
- Beerlao Dark now at the Mango. Happy Hour price from 4:00-8:00 everyday is 75 baht. On Beerlao Wednesdays it’s 75 baht ALL NIGHT.
- Happy Hour has been extended from 5:00-8:00 to 4:00-8:00
- Kitchen now open until 1:00am
Upcoming Events
- Bangkok Fruit Festival 2007 until August 31st at the Gourmet Market at Paragon and The Emporium Department Store (+66(0)23101904. Partake in exotic fruit-tasting at the Bangkok Fruit Fest 2007 starring mangosteen, coconut, rambutan, guava, papaya, rose apple, lychee, durian and many, many more! Discover the secret flavour of fruit tea, preserved fruit, health, beauty or read your personality according to your favourite fruit.
- New Jazz Diva ‘Cherryl Hayes’ appearing at The Diplomat Bar (Conrad Hotel +66(0)26909999) until September 1, 2007
-pmmp
#10: Prep my Durex boxes
I love that one. You know how the expiration dates are always many years away on new condoms? In the US it is always a problem to use up a box before then. For some reason that problem just doesn’t exist in BKK.
Congrats on the 2 year anniversary! Sadly, I’ll miss it as I’ll be out of town that weekend. Darn!
View all comments by SiamSquare
11. Turn down a marriage proposal from a 23-year-old girl (I am 50).
View all comments by On Nutter
Prep the Durex boxes…love it.
Congrats on the 2yr. anniversary. God knows you guys have earned the accolades. Try to keep the damage to a minimum this year.
Cheers,
The AB
View all comments by The Asian Badger
Oh yeah…one other thing. I used to run in “The Hash” in Singapore many years ago. While I admire the conviction and persistence of the Harriers, (ON, ON!!) it just made more sense for me to jog in place for awhile and then find the beer truck or go right to the bar.
But that’s just me.
View all comments by The Asian Badger
Shag ladyboys?
View all comments by Donny
SiamSq and AB: Thx for the congrats. Been a wild ride for sure. AB, nice one. They were an odd bunch but surely having a great time.
Donny: Why? Feeling horny? Kidding. Just playing it up a bit on the Shuttlecock post
View all comments by pmmp
I can’t be there on the 1st, won’t be into town until later in the month, but I’ll certainly stop by and pay my respects.
All these ‘after-hours’ place sure have me curious. A lifetime ago, before wives and kids and mortgages, the only after-hours place was the Thermae or the Thermae.
Patpong had a place called ‘Peppermint’ that could be fun, but nothing like you guys talk about. I’ll have to send the wife on an extended vaction and do some exploring.
View all comments by bo
Sep 1st? I’ll be there, and congrats guys!
As for the 10 things - I completely relate to at least 8 of them. And a few more:
11. Insist my gf wear her University Uniform as she munches down on her lady friend.
12. Calmly feed a rat as I eat from a roadside stall
13. Know the difference between cialis, viagra, kamagra and half a dozen other similar drugs, and need them regularly.
14. Approach girls 18-22 in shopping malls to get phone numbers without expecting to get (a) beaten up (b) sworn at (c) laughed at (d) arrested
View all comments by Mochalover
Regarding the after hours taxi drivers, one of them recently tried to direct me to a place called ‘Boss’, which he said was better than Spicy because it had coyote dancers. Naturally, I chose to disbelieve him, but would be interested to know if it’s any good or not.
View all comments by Combover
Boss and Spicy are the same owners. Boss used to be it and then they opened Spicy so must of us moved to Spicy and some people who never went to Boss will go to Spicy. So the owners realized that Boss would die if they did not do something. So they remodeled and are trying Coyote dancers but I have not been to check it out yet. Anyone?
View all comments by smitty
We tried to go to boss last week to change it up a bit since too many people were recognizing us at Spicy and Boss was closed, actually they used the Thai word for “finished” which I took as it is not open anymore since it was still early in the night. Ended up at lucky instead which is not too far from the old Boss location.
View all comments by bkk22
11. Frequent ladyboy bars,question my sexuality and actually enjoy it!!!
Yee Haa…meat and two veg anyone
View all comments by ChelseaBlue
With all the talk about Durex:
http://news.webindia123.com/news/Articles/Health/20070822/748283.html
Eligible condom testers need not pass any educational qualifications but they must be Thai nationals, at least 20 years old and willing to provide their services free of charge.
View all comments by smitty
1. Being unable to take a piss in a club because of the Thai guy behind me massaging my shoulders. The thought of a man peeking over my shoulder stops my urination reflex. Happened to me twice last night.
2. Fending off advances from a gay taxi driver. I was in the front seat and the girls in the back seat were killing themselves laughing. I used to work in San Francisco and it never happened to me there.
View all comments by Arthur
Great top ten list.
I’ll add one thing I do in Thailand that I would never do in my home country which relates to the McDonald blog:
Going out of my way to eat Mickey D’s breakfast.
This morning, I actually got off the Skytrain at SalaDaeng, onmy way to Saphan Taksin, just to enjoy my first Sausage Egg Mcmuffin in Thailand. How can food that seems so bland at home, taste so good here. Maybe we just like changes and variety.
Re: OnNutter’s number 11 (”Turn down a marriage proposal from a 23-year-old girl (I am 50)”); my slight variation to that is turning down free sex offers from working girls who simply want to sleep in an AC apartment with cable TV, and/or just don’t want to sleep alone because their roommate is on a LT with a customer. I sometimes accept the sex, but always pay to avoid the appearance of having a BF/GF relationship.
I can also relate to Authur’s number 1 reason (Kidneys shutting down when the bathroom boys start their massages). I actually had one come up behind me once, lifting me off the ground while placing both hands on my head, and proceeding to violently crack my neck in both directions while I was trying to keep Junior from pissing on my shoes.
View all comments by DJ
And I just picked up on the planned 2nd Anniversary. I should be returning to Bkk the afternoon of Sept. 1.
I’ve been waiting some time for a good reason to open my bottle of Wild Turkey. OK to bring it to the bash and share it with some old and new friends?
View all comments by DJ
DJ: Of course, bring it along. Love the Wild Turkey. We will also try and have some Thai guys in the bathroom giving massages.
View all comments by pmmp
1. Get laid
View all comments by kwai mai sabai
More to the point:
#11. Instead of classifying girls as either “would” or “wouldn’t”, we classify them as “will” or “won’t”.
View all comments by Bangkok Bad Boy
Real time blogging update: 4 am August 25th.
Spicy got shut down tonight at 1:30, first time this has happened in the 30+ times I’ve been there. They were trying to get people to go to a place called Soda on Suk 5. I opted to go to the NEW Boss. The OLD Boss was across from Central World. The NEW Boss location is still on Radjamari Road but near the intersection with Rama 9. New Boss is 300 baht has 2 levels and does have coyote dancers. Coyote dancers are a waste considering you have a bar full of Thai girls who want to dance on the platform. Different vibe than Spicy, but same prices. Still like Spicy better, hope it doesn’t get shut down again.
View all comments by bkk22
Thanks for the update bkk22. Spicy hasn’t been closed early in a while. Hopefully it was just a one-time event.
The club on Suk Soi 5 above Foodland is also owned by the Spicy and Boss owners, Soda is I believe another rename of the place. It started out as DiscoTech, then Deo, and now Soda. It hasn’t caught on yet so I guess they renamed it see if that helps.
View all comments by pmmp
Does anyone know how I could find the phone number for Cascade Night Club in Nana Plaza in Bangkok? I have tried everywhere.
View all comments by Paul
Paul: It’s unlikely that Cascade Ladyboy GoGo in Nana Plaza even has a telephone line in the GoGo. Your best bet is to go there and get the mamasan’s mobile telephone number if you need to contact them on a regular basis.
View all comments by pmmp