The FARANG Speaks 2 Much (tfs2m)

Hey folks. Desperate times call for desperate measures and we are not talking about Thasky baby losing his special passport cover or how all u locals need to quickly buy up the illegal shares of Tesco and Carefour - we have bigger fish to fry. What the HELL do u do with white women in Bangkok? Don’t laugh folks. This is not easy. Imagine u have a business trip to the Big Mango and instead of bringing the boys u have to bring the girls. Bringing the boys is easy since there are plenty of places to go but bringing the ladies actually requires some special attention. I will offer a few of my suggestions but let’s hope our dear readers can help out in a pinch.

1. Go to a market. Any market. U name it from Suan Lum, JJ or the floating market. Just get them there though. I vote for JJ since it will be easy to lose them and since u already planned on what to do if they get lost(u lose them) - u meet them the next morning in the hotel for breakfast thus giving u an entire night out without them.

2. Take them to Siam Paragon. It is huge. For sure u can lose them here. For example - while in the aquarium u can fake a stomach illness brought on by the Isaan Somtam u introduced them to and once again resort to plan b. Meeting them in the hotel the next day for breakfast.

3. Go the the puppet show at the Joe Louis theater. While it is dark u can exit stage left. Resort to plan b.

4. Take them to the pussy smoking show at Long Gun as a true Thailand Cultural Experience. Hopefully they will be so disgusted with it they will leave u there and go back to their hotel. Thus allowing u to drink, bar fine and implement plan B.

5. If they actually like item 4 then take them to the official Isaan cultural center. The ICC - AKA Nana Plaza. Bar fine one Thai girl and take your co-workers, the Thai bird and yourself to the on site short time hotel and get busy. Life is good.

any takers?